From Lapland to Poundland

One of the main issues reported on DNO in 2013 has been the increasing dependence on food banks by communities in Britain and the machinations of national and local government to deflect their increasing prevalence from being linked to policies such as welfare benefit changes, the bedroom tax and Job Centre Sanctions.

This has been achieved by ‘creative’ interpretation of statistics, reduced reporting, changing referral methods, outright denials of the results of respected studies, attempts to muzzle charities from lobbying, criticizing religious leaders and holding a monopoly on the commissioning, delivery and evaluation of services.

DNO will continue to link people to the national, local and personal stories that are a testimony to the real effects of the policies of our elected representatives both locally and nationally. DNO will continue to lampoon and debunk the hogwash, piffle, buffoonery and hypocrisy emanating from most of them while supporting those that expose their tosh.

With Christmas pending DNO challenged some of its resident poets to write something entitled ‘ From Lapland to Poundland’. Here are a couple of the results:

From Lapland to Poundland by the Reverend Graham Charlish

If you do ponder of your pound
Your life is not too sound around

You maybe wish upon a star
Troubles countered near and far

Money drains through fingers cold
And worry when you get quite old

When children wear just hand me down
I shudder when I see them frown

With food and warmth it shouldn’t cost
As days get short and nights of frost

May think of rich but always poor
And stay the drafts from creaky door

A trip to Lapland is my curse
As Poundland counts from empty purse


From Lapland to Poundland by Ken Duddle

Simon was a happy elf

Who always wore a smile

One of Santa’s best elves

Willing to go the extra mile.

With trousers of green, tunic red

And a bright yellow bobble hat

Simon whistled a happy tune

While at his workbench he sat.

Answering letters to Santa

From all the girls and boys

Stamping Made in Lapland

On all the childrens toys.

For three months Simon toiled

Hardly time for a rest

But satisfied in the knowledge

That he had given his best.

But Simon’s work was seasonal

And soon it came to an end.

So upon the shores of England

Simon did descend.

At the local job centre

He was told he had to work

He could not draw benefits

If he intended to shirk.

So he was sent to Poundland

And stacking shelves he had to do

Not really an ideal job

For an elf of five foot two.

Simon became sadder and sadder

And considered taking pills

Until he saw Santa arrive

To start work on the tills.

Simon was happy again

Looking forward to the day

When he would return to Lapland

On Santa’s reindeer pulled sleigh.



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